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I'd Better Stick With Turkeys

BlackduckOne of the bad things about being a writer is that when you screw up, it's there for all the world to see. Nick Wansha of Rochester, N.Y. was quick to jump on my case following an article I wrote for the Dec/Jan Outdoor Life where I recounted a trip I took to Alaska.

Nick wrote (the bolded words are his): "That has to be the biggest pile bull scat that I ever read! That article had to been fabricated. First, the author indicates that "Besides old-squaw and other diving sea ducks (are there any puddler sea ducks?), we also experienced prime shooting at mallards, black ducks, and other large dabblers. There are no black ducks in Kodiak, Alaska let alone prime shooting of them! The black duck resides in Atlantic and to a lesser extent, the Mississippi flyways. Obviously, this article is a farce and the author just shot down his and your magazine's credibility."

Wow, I did all of that with one mistaken identification! What a burden to shoulder. Nick is right, there are no black ducks in Alaska, but ease up dude! You're going to blow out a ventricle getting so worked up over one error.

I did screw up. Hell, I'm a turkey hunter, not an expert waterfowler. I duck hunt like I golf. I love it, but if I get a chance to do it more than a couple of times a year, I'm really doing something. And I miscalled that one instead of double checking with my expert sources. I should have stuck with what we actually shot, which (if I recall correctly, I don't have my notes with me Nick) were some mallards and a few old squaw. What I do know is that there were a lot of freakin' ducks flying around out there!

Growing up doing the occassional mill pond duck hunt along the sucky Atlantic flyway, about all I ever saw were mallards, teal and woodducks. Beyond that, my identification is hit or miss and I rely on the more experienced hunters I'm with to be sure.

Oh, and I apologize, Nick, for the redundancy of diving and sea duck. I guess it's like your refusal to use proper articles and prepositions in conjunction with some nouns (and one missed helping verb, too). One mistake does not a farce make! Shakespeare said that, or was it Moe from the Three Stooges or did I just make it up. I can't remember...


Brian V

Dear Outdoor Life,

I have subscribed to your magazine for several years now. However, after the Jim Zumbo comments and now the public bashing of a writer with egg on his face I wish to cancel my subscription immediately. I feel that my money will be better spent on individuals who are selfless and best represent my family and I.

A former reader



Who did you have write the above statement. It says it was posted Andy Larson. Is that your secretary or your editor? What? Have you lost your ability to write or have the editors of outdoor life taken that privilege away from you.

I smell a character deformation case brewing for Nick. Using the guys name on a public forum and bashing him. I have have seen cases like this win every time.

Good luck with that Doug. I think Outdoor Life should help you join Zumbo in land of the unemployed. If they were looking out for their finacial interests they would. If I was your employer you would have already been terminated.

Best of Luck

Matt G.



The name of each post is at the end, not the beginning. It says Doug at the end.


R. Jones

Man! Some of you posters need to seriously consider decaffeinated beverages.

Zumbo I can see, but this? Ya’ll have toooo much time on your hands.


Boo-hoo I'm going cancel my subscription. Get a life! Is it possible Doug that you slept with the wives of all of these jackwads? Perhaps some of them should defer their hunting literary pursuits to that of the New York Times or Washington Post. Oh, that's right they post retractions too. Just hope I don't run into any of these schmucks in the woods because I wouldn't want to be criticized for wearing the wrong kind of camo. Keep it coming Doug!